Beach

Being here is like being in another bubble. Just not the Oxford bubble. This is the sleep late, eat everything, be lazy bubble. Time moves much faster here than in the Oxford bubble, and it is much more worthless. I think I'll be leaving here soon.

My father and sister just left, so I am here alone, at the beach. Sounds like a dream right? Apartment to myself, the weather is beautiful, a grill and meat to grill on it, books to read, rays to catch... What have I done with my time so far? Well, I watched The Graduate, I feel like it is appropriate since I can relate with Benjamin Braddock in his sense of being lost after college graduation. Except that older women are thankfully not trying to seduce me. What else can I do with my time? Read I guess...

Reading list:
Called to be Holy A Biblical Perspective John N. Oswalt (Thank you Smiths)
Of Time and the River Thomas Wolfe
On the Road Jack Kerouac
Foley's Luck Tom Chiarella
finally finish Mere Christianity CS Lewis

That's all for now, I guess

So what?

I sat in the dining hall of the ATO house on Wednesday night and typed the final word of my seminar paper for English 452. Then I typed ".". I looked up and around me and back at the computer screen and focused on what I had just written. I said aloud to myself, "That's the last bit of work I'll ever do again for the University of Mississippi." The feeling was surreal, and still is. I really have been trying to grasp onto some sort of way to describe how I feel about all of this, being done with college, with definitely the best four years of my life so far.

The lifestyle that I had so immortalized in my mind in high school is over, done. I guess I had always been looking forward to this, as in the past four years, and never thought about the years beyond. I think we are trained that way, to prepare ourselves for college in the hope that college will, in turn, automatically have us ready for life, a career, family, you know, America 101. I assumed exactly that, that I would not have to think about the future beyond which classes to take, that I would just be "ready". I'm not, honestly. I'm excited and interested to see what the future holds, but am I ready? No. I'm prepared but I will never be ready. Ready to give up studying subjects and taking classes of my choice which interest me, while being surrounded by the best friends who I will ever have, with the freedom to do almost anything I please within (almost always) the law? Never. But then again, if I did not leave now, when could I?

"No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for the kingdom of God" -Luke 9:62

So I guess it is just that time. Time to hang up the college hat. Time to say goodbye. Time to make some new friends, I am starting to sound like Ecclesiastes here, but its true. It's just time.

The following are all pictures from the past four years from our camping to my pledge brothers to time at Julie's farm to our Korean friends to Mark's birthday to formals to geocaching to intramurals to bid day to last summer in Jordan to gatorbashes to snow in Oxford to my first trip to the Middle East to our dog Dexter on Christmas to the epic road trip with Michael, Brady and Markus to more fraternity parties to Rome spring break to even more fraternity antics to Peru with dad and finally to pictures at the house before I left for college:

(From the most recent):

The past week has been a roller coaster and in one more I will have graduated from college. It is strange that it is so close, I have not even fully realized it yet. My birthday was on Tuesday and it was the best birthday I have ever had by far. I finished my first 15-page paper, I ate at Rice & Spice for lunch with Brady and Lacey, got a couple of shirts from my dad, a bible from my mom, drank the methusalem of St. Bernadus Belgian ale with my pledge class at our senior dinner, ate a thick steak at senior dinner, experienced the best worship I have ever heard at Crusade, hung out with my pledge class on the square, got pulled into going to Tunica to celebrate, put $10 on number 22 at the roulette table and it hit for $350.

What a day.

And of course, then school struck. Arabic presentation on Wednesday, Geology test and revised English paper due Thursday, and Arabic paper due Friday. All on barely any sleep.


Then we had a brother/sister campout in Sardis, but the mosquitoes eventually forced us back to Oxford.

Then the crazy dancing marathon with international students at Mr. Bill's Saturday afternoon.

Then cookout with lot's of Sot's at Josh's.

Today: church, running, quick picnic and now time for 15 page paper round 2.

Tuesday: 2 tests

Wednesday: 1 test, paintball with Arabic class, paper due

Saturday: graduation/ move out

Sunday: new chapter of life

Also: Cancelled the internship for this summer. I need to focus on support for next year with Crusade. (By the way I am 40% raised, hallelujah!) So this summer I will be in Tuscaloosa, Honduras for a week in June, Indian Springs ten days in July and Chicago one week in August, other than that I'll be pretty free.

I am beginning to desire my lifestyle next year. The culture, language, the team I will be with, the food, the day-to-day schedule, my role there. I am becoming ready to just focus on one thing and be out of the role as an undergraduate student in the U.S. It will be nice to just have to work on my relationship with the Lord, Arabic, and my relationships with others. Period. Not Geology 105 or Contemporary Native American Literature. Just the things that matter.

Love God, Love People

أحب الرب إلهك بكل قلبك وكل نفسك وكل فكرك...وأحب قريبك كنفسك

(pictures to come)